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Turner CEO: "PVR Users Are Thieves"

timothy posted more than 12 years ago | from the they'll-burn-with-the-library-and-museum-goers dept.

Television 971

mrbrown1602 writes: "It was bound to happen - 2600.com is reporting that Turner Broadcasting CEO Jamie Kellner is calling PVR users thieves. When asked why personal video recorders are bad for the industry, Keller says 'Because of the ad skips.... It's theft. Your contract with the network when you get the show is you're going to watch the spots. Otherwise you couldn't get the show on an ad-supported basis. Any time you skip a commercial or watch the button you're actually stealing the programming.' Since when have we made contracts with the broadcasters for watching their content? More of the 2600 article can be found here."

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fp (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3448630)

wow, fr0st p1$7? yee haw

First post for dwc (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3448634)

First post for dwc, w00t

Contract with the networks (3, Funny)

spookysuicide (560912) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448639)

Apparently there was no clause in the contract about quality of programming, have you seen the crap on TNT?

Re:Contract with the networks (4, Funny)

spookysuicide (560912) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448653)

And on another note, on most of the turner stations, the ads are the best thing they're broadcasting.

OT: suicidegirls (0, Offtopic)

autopr0n (534291) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449048)

Emo? I have to say I hated that term since the first time I heard it. And how can you have emo porn?

But thats beside the point. Any chance of hooking a fellow slashdot sig porn spammer up with a free account?

Re:OT: suicidegirls (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449089)

Wtf is up with the pics on a lot of these pr0n sites? I click on a thumbnail and the pic flashes up on the screen for a sec and then is replaced by just the url of the pic in black text on a white background. I'm using Mozilla 1.0RC1 and I'm not accepting cookies from the site. Is it something that the sites are doing to punish me for not accepting cookies, or is it something misconfigured on my end?

Re:Contract with the networks (-1, Redundant)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3448658)

Last time I checked, broadcasters are using spectrum free of charge. When a broadcaster transmits a commercial there is no quid pro quo that we'll watch it. This is why men have perfected the art of channel surfing.

This entire issue is another example of business models failing as technology progresses. They should wake up and create new business models to complement the technology rather than stifle innovation.

Re:Contract with the networks (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3448970)

Death to Tuner and his pro fucking towelhead CNN, crescent news network. DEATH TO FUCKING TURNER! DEATH!
I see a world of GOATS. A goat fucking extravaganza. I invoke the ANUS of DOOM! I hate Taco.
SON of the GOAT, HUGE ASS WIDENER, This is a massive, massive ass attack from the Minister of Goat, Ayatollah man-meat. [bmezine.com]
Dilated Meat Pie. Most suppressed people really like seeing this. It gives them new masturbatory fodder. [bmezine.com]
Two cucumbers, better than one. This is to show that the giver is really smaller than what is needed to fill GOATSE man. He east Cheerioatse brand O's [bmezine.com]
A Disney product right where it belongs. Up a goat's ass. Death to Mike Eisner, the butt buddy of Commander Tak0. [bmezine.com]
Raw and dilated man-pussy. Put back the trouser snake, Tako. You dick is way too small for this man's ass. [bmezine.com]
A Prolapsed rectum is sure to whet even the most jaded flaming fuck's appetite. Tak0, your penis is regrettably way too small, even for your "Fiancée's" unfettered anus. She doesn't want to dirty her ass with the likes of your pathetic member. [bmezine.com]
GOAT KORAN [goatse.cx]
Classic Oh yeah, in the shitter some more, in the shitter. [es.org]
Classic More ass stretching goodness. [es.org]
Female Goater My pussy is too small for this APPLE. [es.org]
Goatse Grandpas - GRANPA GOAT S3X0R5 [es.org]
Son of a Goat - Holy fucking son of a goat. Kind of looks like Tako from behind, but to be sure I'd have to ask CowGryl Kneel [conhugeco.org]
1 Oh, pardon me sir, would you happen to have any ANAL LUBE? [conhugeco.org]
2 UNGH FART, pssssbt, ungh, tweeep, squeaaaaaak ungh [conhugeco.org]
3 PFFFFFFFFFFT AHH pffft [conhugeco.org]
4 FOOOOOOOOOOOOF blud dribble dribble [conhugeco.org]
Prime Number Shitting Goatse Man See The Prime numbers flow like the river SHIT [massivewang.com]
Goatse Returns! Fuck yeah, the goat man is a coming back to Trollaxor [trollaxor.com]
I summon the powers of HUGE GAPING ASS!
1 You Will Love to Goatse on all the things of Internet.

2 Will Search and initiate to new members, and you will show the way to the light (www.goatse.es.org)
3 When they return of to see our God Goatse, you mock of them.
4 To fuck, to fuck that are shocked the planets!

* g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * [goatse.cx]
gcccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccc cg
oc/ccccc\ccccccccccccc\cccccccccccc/cccc\ccccc cco
a|ccccccc|ccccccccccccc\cccccccccc|cccccc|ccc ccca
t|ccccccc`.ccccccccccccc|ccccccccc|ccccccc:c cccct
s`cccccccc|ccccccccccccc|cccccccc\|ccccccc| cccccs
ec\ccccccc|c/ccccccc/cc\\\ccc--__c\\cccccc c:cccce
xcc\cccccc\/ccc_--~~cccccccccc~--__|c\ccc cc|ccccx
*ccc\cccccc\_-~cccccccccccccccccccc~-_\c ccc|cccc*
gcccc\_ccccc\cccccccc_.--------.______\ |ccc|ccccg
occcccc\ccccc\______//c_c___c_c(_(__>c c\ccc|ccc c
accccccc\ccc.ccCc___)cc______c(_(____>cc|cc/ccc c
tccccccc/\c|cccCc____)/cccccc\c(_____>cc|_/cccc c
scccccc/c/\|cccC_____)c_Taco_|cc(___>ccc/cc\ccc c
eccccc|ccc(ccc_C_____)\_ccccc/cc//c_/c/ccccc\cc ce
xccccc|cccc\cc|__ccc\\_________//c(__/ccccccc| ccx
*cccc|c\cccc\____)ccc`----ccc--'ccccccccccccc |cc*
gcccc|cc\_cccccccccc___\ccccccc/_cccccccccc_ /c|cg
occc|cccccccccccccc/cccc|ccccc|cc\ccccccccc ccc|co
accc|ccccccccccccc|cccc/ccccccc\cc\ccccccc cccc|ca
tccc|cccccccccc/c/cccc|ccccccccc|cc\ccccc cccccc|t
sccc|ccccccccc/c/cccccc\__/\___/cccc|ccc ccccccc|s
ecc|ccccccccccc/cccccccc|cccc|ccccccc|c cccccccc|e
xcc|cccccccccc|ccccccccc|cccc|ccccccc| ccccccccc|x
* g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x *

These liberals scare you in today's world from saying the "N" word.
These liberals tell you race mixing is ok.
These same liberals say pledge of allegiance to the flag is wrong in school.
These same liberals say gays are ok in boy scouts, since when is a thirteen year old gay?
These same liberals say no to guns.
These same liberals smoke 3 packs a day and then sue the tobacco companies.
These same liberals increase your taxes and then spend it overseas while taking vacations on their own islands.
These same liberals give the "minorities" legalized racism.
To hell with all of you.
HAVE PRIDE in YOUR CULTURE - Be a WESTERNER. Fuck Islam, fuck China, fuck all the other Eastern backward assholes. They live in a pit of shit.
"There is a class of colored people who make a business of keeping the troubles, the wrongs, and the hardships of the negro race before the public. Some of these people do not want the negro to lose his grievances, because they do not want to lose their jobs. There is a certain class of race-problem solvers who don't want the patient to get well. - Booker T. Washington, 1911
WHEEL CHAIR MAFIA (For all the whiney cripple shits)
KLIN-TONGS - FA-TASSES (A play on fucker Yasser's FATAH)
TURD-WORLD (The shit holes that are not America)
GOVERNMENT-MEDIA-COMPLEX (Fuck Disney, Fuck Eisner, Fuck them ALL)
WOOLY-HAIR LIBERAL - ANAL RIGHTS (For all the fags who want the public to pay for their AIDS medications - FUCK OFF)

Jesse Jackson a confirmed dirty foul thief, adulterer, lied about having college degree, was never ordained as a minister. Extortionist.
Michael Jackson, pedophile.
OJ Simpson, murderer.
Michael Jordan, adulterer.
Rap Stars, categorically, murdering, drug pushing, anti society homicidal maniacs show project a most disgusting but exceedingly popular image of ghetto violence and culture.
Magic Johnson, adulterous AIDS infested person, almost infected his wife with AIDS that he got off someone else while cheating on his wife.
Halle Berry's mother is white, her father is black. Her black father beat her mother and abandoned them.
Farrakhan - anti Semitic elitist foul violence mongering horrible person. Should be in prison.
Mike Tyson, rapist, convicted and chronic.
Don King - convicted murderer, high roller promoter. Convicted murders should not be popular negro role models.
Ike Turner, beat his wife Tina.
Bobby Brown, beat the shit out of Whitney Houston. (Also sentenced to 75 days in Jail for driving while drunk, in addition to beating Whitney)
And Condy Rice, Clarence Thomas and Colin Powell are traitors? This is what kills me the most about liberals. Some good conservative hard working people like Rice and Powell get themselves out of the fucking gutter, and their own fucking people stab them in the back.

Get some real leadership, or face doom. You liberal fucking scum, you are a disgrace to yourselves.

Is it also theft to just NOT WATCH the ads? (2)

splorf (569185) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448642)

Give me a break. Next they'll ban remote controls that let you turn the sound off during ads.

Re:Is it also theft to just NOT WATCH the ads? (1)

ankit (70020) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448665)

And when that is done, they will ban people not looking at the TV when the ads are playing, or not paying attention to ads.

And next, they will make it compulsory for people to 'respond' to ads by buying whatever they are trying to sell...

Thank God I dont have a tv!
Oh wait... they can do this with magazines and the internet as well!!!

Re:Is it also theft to just NOT WATCH the ads? (1)

ragefan (267937) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448995)

Thank God I dont have a tv!

Oh wait... they can do this with magazines and the internet as well!!!

Uhh... it's stealing content to not look at the ads in magazines and newspapers, and to not click on *every* banner ad... :-)

So wait if that is theft... (5, Funny)

rblancarte (213492) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449020)

Will they pay me if I record their channel and JUST watch the comercials? It sounds like a sound arguement.


Re:Is it also theft to just NOT WATCH the ads? (0, Redundant)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3448965)

Is closing your eyes or going for a pee allowed?

Re:Is it also theft to just NOT WATCH the ads? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449062)

You're allowed to close your eyes for a "reasonable amount of time", no more.

Re:Is it also theft to just NOT WATCH the ads? (1)

Janax (559862) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449063)

Next there will be legislated monitors installed into screens to monitor the rate you blink during ads. A maximum rate of tolerance will be assigned otherwise you will be in violation. Covering up this device will also be illegal.

No more falling asleep on the sofa in front of the screen either! Same goes for the TV in the bedroom...

Thats totaly unnessesary. (4, Funny)

autopr0n (534291) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449090)

No such draconian measures are required. A simple mandatory commercial display device (CDD) will be required to be installed in the bathroom, behind (for the guys) and in front (for the ladies) the toilet.

A computer will detect when you fall asleep, and will air specially created 'sleepverts' that influence buying decisions why the consumer is asleep!

See, no draconian measures are required at all! Good behaviour will be rewarded with soma

NOT FUNNY [Re:Is it also theft to just NOT WATCH] (1)

ariels (6608) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449072)

Read the Inside [inside.com] story quoted by 2600. Closing your eyes is apparently not covered under the current contract; the other thing is a grey area, but evidently broadcasters are currently lax about enforcement:

CW: What if you have to go to the bathroom or get up to get a Coke?

JK: I guess there's a certain amount of tolerance for going to the bathroom. But if you formalize it and you create a device that skips certain second increments, you've got that only for one reason, unless you go to the bathroom for 30 seconds. They've done that just to make it easy for someone to skip a commercial.

Re:Is it also theft to just NOT WATCH the ads? (1)

rickymoz (533931) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449012)

I was fearing this will come sooner or later. I'm just wondering they don't call it "Copyright theft" like the Dallas Morning News Thread [slashdot.org] from yesterday.

What those companies would like is to controll everything we do, like

"Now YOU watch this, don't turn your head and watch out of the window - no! Watch this (especially if it's a commercial) and listen to closely. You will understand why you want to buy this product, even if you don't need it. And Hey! don't turn off the sound, just watching is not enough. If you don't, we will sue you, because you are a thief, you are violating the copyright."

Big Brother, 1984... Well, for sure, now we are slowly but surely coming to this date...

Fair use = STEALING (5, Insightful)

HanzoSan (251665) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449070)

Face it, its their way of trying to make you feel morally wrong for doing what you have a right to do.

You paid for access to the information, once it gets to you its YOURS to do whatever you want with it, or at least thats how it should be. information is NOT an object, its more like air, they want to charge you for air and then say you are a thief if you use the air in the wrong way, (example you find a way to use the air to create more air)

what an asshole (0)

fz00 (466988) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448643)

i suppose he hasn't heard of a vcr which has the same exact technology. or cable tv for that matter.

Broadcast Data (4, Funny)

sflanker (146802) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448649)

How does receiving publicly broadcast data bind you to a contract? It wasn't in the EULA when I bought my TV.

Ha Ha friggin Ha. (5, Insightful)

Erik_Kahl (260470) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448655)

This is silly. I pay my damned cable company ~50 for the right to watch whatever portion I want of what they send down the wire. I didn't agree to watch everything they offer.

Are they going to come and beat me now up if I flip the channel during a commercial. I almost always do.

This is silly.

Flipping channels (1)

vagnerr (214527) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449025)

Have you not noticed how strangly almost all the channels have their adverts at exactly the same time. "Ah adverts, i'll just channel hop for a bit, adverts, adverts, adverts.... etc" Its almost as if they all work together to make sure this happens, but that can't be right? ... Can it?

Re:Flipping channels (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449049)

Ive noticed this too! Pisses the hell outta me...

I find this friggen disgusting (2, Interesting)

rosewood (99925) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448656)

I really don't know how else to phrase it other then what I put in my subject. I can not beleive they call this shit theft. These exces must have shit their pants when VCRs come out. All PVRs for the the purposes of these execs are faster VCRs. I agree with the post, this is bullshit. I can't say I signed a contract with anyone when I watch TV. Shit, before I just channel surffed - I guess I was breaking the contract with that one too. Btw, they broke their contract with their shitty programing, no?

I'm the biggest thief there is (2, Funny)

Aash (130966) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448663)

If skipping ads is akin to stealing, then I'm public enemy number one. Personally, I never watch ads. Whenever I tape a show, I'll fast-forward the commericals. And if I'm watching a show while it's on, I'll flick during the ads. I hate commercials.

I'd better start watching my back. The feds could pick me up at any moment.

Re:I'm the biggest thief there is (2, Funny)

shr3k (451065) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448972)

Yeah, I'm must be one too. I save time by turning 1 hour long broadcasts into 40 min runs by fast-forwarding through commercials.

Maybe I should start charging them for wasting my time?

EULA's for TV! Coming soon! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3448664)

By watching this TV show, you are hereby agreeing that you will watch all commercials, purchases all products, grant full access to your bank account...

Re:EULA's for TV! Coming soon! (5, Funny)

gregfortune (313889) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449022)

And the most important line buried 5000 words into the EULA right before the

"You will not mute out offensive phrases as that alters the impact of the message"

and right after

"Men must not immediately change the channel upon hearing the 'pretty flower music' that always signals tampon commercials"

resides the infamous

By pressing the 'Power' button on your remote (either on or off), you hereby agree to watch TV during each meal, for 1.5 hours before working a 8 hour day or 7.2 hours on a day off and a minumum of 3.2 hours before you are allowed to sleep. Failure to comply with this clause will find you in violation of the DMCA for using tihs product in a manner not expected by the manufacturer as well as modifying the results of our required viewer/commercial ratio."

I have been a thief for decades! (5, Funny)

aussersterne (212916) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448967)

I don't look at ads anywhere -- on television, at the cinema, on shopping center walls... And yet I continue to keep my eyes open and see everything else!

I am stealing all of society! I will crush the world economy! It is my evil masterplan!

Bwahahaha! Ha-ha!

strange things are afoot ;) (3, Interesting)

pangloss (25315) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449091)

laugh now.
but bill and ted will have their revenge:
- digital television, brought to you through your xbox2.
- advertising overlays on your shows every three minutes that you can only get rid of by pressing a special key combo on your xbox controller

what's scary is that you could almost see something like this happening. how fucked up is that?

the future according to the broadcast companies (5, Insightful)

Sarin (112173) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448974)

Normally I just zap away during a commercial break.
If they get what they want then I can imagine a future with digital tv, when you zap away the commercial break too long, you will be banned from watching the end of the show.
There's going to be all kinds of irritating rules if we don't watch out.

Re:the future according to the broadcast companies (1)

nicky_d (92174) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448993)

> Normally I just zap away during a commercial
> break. If they get what they want then I can
> imagine a future with digital tv, when you zap
> way the commercial break too long, you will be
> banned from watching the end of the show.

And should you choose to read a magazine or look out the window during the ad break, they can put up a list of observational questions about the adverts that have to be answered before the show resumes. Hey, that's not bad... to the patent office!

People owning a toilet, kitchen are thieves (1)

daBass (56811) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448976)

Beter close the curtains next time I take a whiz or get some Haagen Dasz from the fridge during the ad breaks, for all I know a neighbour might be watching and snitch on me!

Networks Are Given Free Airspace in Public Trust (1)

loggia (309962) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448977)

Consider that the major networks are given public airspace to broadcast for FREE.

That's right. Free. NBC pays the government how much for the rights to its frequency? Zero. New HDTV channels? Zero.

Channels that exist exclusively on cable or satellite are paid for in your cable or satellite bill.

And that about covers it.

Can't hold it much longer... (1)

yoshi_mon (172895) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448979)

"I guess there's a certain amount of tolerance for going to the bathroom."

Wow, I sure am glad he cleared that up. Feeling the a thief every time I made a trip to the can during a commercial was bringing me down.

Other Crimes (5, Interesting)

jackal! (88105) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448980)

Skiping commercials is theft? Then what about hitting mute? What about going to the bathroom? What about talking loudly to your loved ones during commercial? Gonna send us to jail for that?

Should we envision a dark future where you watch a show and then are QUIZZED on the ads you saw? If you pass you're good, if you fail you're fined? That's the only way I can see this form of theft ever really held in check.

When I buy something and take it home or have it delivered to my home, I can do whatever I want with it. If I buy something I can use it however I want. I can even throw it away if I want. Same should apply with my cable television. I paid for it, it was delivered. I didn't sign any contracts promising I'd watch any single second of it, and whatever I do with it is up to me -- the sale never stated otherwise.

And what about broadcast television? What are your signals doing tresspassing on my property? Okay, that one's a bit silly, there are federal regulations for airwaves, but it isn't much siller than calling skipping an ad theft.

Re:Other Crimes (2)

forgoil (104808) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449005)

Exactly. What kind of crap are they trying to pull? This sounds like some kind of Taliban influenced thinking. Most people I know switch channels when there are commercials on, everyone hates them and irritated by them. They love getting the shows on VCD because they can watch it when they want and without commercials.

Stopping PVRs is stupid and should be ignored by everyone.

Re:Other Crimes (1)

ankit (70020) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449077)

Yea, kind of reminds me of the "Thought Police" from 1984...
But that was a satire on extreme communism, wasnt it?

What about newspapers? (1)

andawyr (212118) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448981)

Maybe the next time I pick up a newspaper I'll cut out all the ads, just so I don't have to see them, let alone read them. 'Course, if I did that, there'd be nothing left of the paper :-)

Using a PVR constitutes theft. What a ridiculous argument.

If all commercials... (1)

BalkanBoy (201243) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448982)

were as entertaining as the Budweiser "WHATUUUPPPP", then I might consider viewing them ;-).

Kinda like "Contact"... (1)

Posiks (532176) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448984)

Hasn't this whole ad scenario already been mocked enough in Carl Sagan's "Contact"? I really can't even take it seriously now...

Contract? (1)

Innomi (566928) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448986)

What contract?

Stealing (2, Funny)

mmThe1 (213136) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448988)

you're actually stealing the programming

Okay! I will record only the ads and watch them 200 times...hope that will compensate them for the loss...

The future of TV and commercials (5, Insightful)

btempleton (149110) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448989)

The bad news is the Supreme Court betamax decision, if you read it in detail, may not protect automatic commercial skipping, though it would probably protect manual skipping like the 30 second button or 60x FF.

I've written up an essay of one possible result of the conflict between commercial TV, PVRs, commercial skip and DRM.

You can read about The future of TV [templetons.com] in the essay.

Re:The future of TV and commercials (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449093)

The real question is:

Did the Supreme Court address whether you can legally go to the john during a commercial? ;-)

Sorry, Cable was to be ad free. BZZT. (3, Insightful)

Zeio (325157) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448991)

Why do I pay for cable? I remember when they were laying out the lines that it was supposed to be that you paid for a subscription to avoid ads!


And cable stations didn't have to following the 7 dirty words and decency regulations.

What a crock. MTV is sanitized, no one shows skin, its all a failure.

Sorry, Turner, you and your mogul pals failed to deliver. How about showing European style ads with breasts showing? I hate American TV for how sanitized it is. Forget you TED.

I feel like getting a Tivo - I have already upgraded several for my friends, I should just do it. Thanks for MFSTools.

As for Turner's content, it's a joke. Time for Direct TV with a Tivo BUILT IN!!!

End rant;

Re:Sorry, Cable was to be ad free. BZZT. (2)

ImaLamer (260199) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449009)

You are correct.

If you are paying monthly fees to get commercial funded channels then you are "paying twice".

Networks such as TNT, TNN, Comedy Central, National Geographic, et. al. are funded by commercials - yet Turner charges us on "tier" plans.

They own my cable company anyways...

hehehe (2, Funny)

Edmund Blackadder (559735) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449041)

"Forget you Ted"

Excuses, excuses ... (1)

Scotch Game (442068) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448992)

Uh, our registered impression numbers? Oh. Well. Those. Heh. Funny you should ask! Um ... Well ... Well, you know what it is ... Uhhhh ... Oh! Oh! I know! It's those PVRs!!! It's the VIEWERS! They're STEALING! That's it! It's not us! It's the VIEWERS! Gosh, boy am I MAD! Gladys! Get in here and take a letter! I'm so MAD I'm going to issue a STATEMENT!

my favorite part... (1)

carpe_noctem (457178) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448994)

Quoting from the article the 2600 article references...

CW: What if you have to go to the bathroom or get up to get a Coke?
JK: I guess there's a certain amount of tolerance for going to the bathroom. But if you formalize it and you create a device that skips certain second increments, you've got that only for one reason, unless you go to the bathroom for 30 seconds. They've done that just to make it easy for someone to skip a commercial.

Ok, so you're allowed to go to the bathroom. But just don't be in there too long buddy! We'll have you taken to court for violating your contract!

WTF? (3, Funny)

Deltan (217782) | more than 12 years ago | (#3448996)

That's right kids, your cable bill buys you.. spam! Not just any spam, but spam that talks to you and tells you how much you need their products.

I don't remember agreeing to anything about watching commercials and actually wanting to. Nowhere did I put my john hancock on a piece of paper saying, "I wanna see Billy Mays pimp more Oxi Clean to me!"

Someone explain to me PVR's are any different from VCR's with "VCR Plus!" which automatically mark commercials and skip over them when you watch a recorded tape. Same thing, except it's not instantaneous like a PVR. Why is one stealing and one is not?

AOL TW if you're reading. Wanna save some of that 45B mark down? Fire her ass, you'll save yourselves a whole lotta grief down the road.

Don't forget! When you're stealing TV (that you paid for), you're watching communism. :P

So am I a thief (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3448997)

I turn the channel when ads come on. I feel so bad now. I think I'll go write a check to ted turner. I know he has billions, but dammit I stole his show and that makes me a criminal.

50 hail marys and 20 our fathers

disgusting (5, Insightful)

gvonk (107719) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449001)

The only payment for a lot [of content] is the willingness of the viewer to watch the spot, the commercial. That's part of the contract between the network and the viewer. For anybody to step in between that content and encourage the viewer to disregard the payment in time that he's making--I think everybody should fight those people...or let the viewer have a subscription model where they pay for that, in which case the monies can be taken in and distributed back to cover the loss of the ad revenue.

This is wrong on so many levels. I can watch whatever the fuck I want to of the television programming you send into my house. If I want to watch only 3 minutes of CSPAN perday and nothing else, so be it. If I want to watch only the 5 or 6 interesting shows on the air, so be it. If I want to close my eyes and not watch the ads or find some other way to not watch them, too freakin bad for you! YOU were the one who decided that the volatile business model of selling advertising would bring you stable profits; you are the one taking the risk and putting together the programming together in the first place.
I don't owe you anything.

Re:disgusting (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449035)

uhhh...arent we already paying?

Re:disgusting (2)

Danse (1026) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449082)

Yeah.. but i guess we just aren't paying enough for their liking. We need legislation to increase their profits!

What they don't realize... (1)

Cornelius the Great (555189) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449002)

...is that the vast majority of us change channels during commercials.

Karma Whoring: Link to Full Interview (1, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449003)

CableWorld interview with Turner [inside.com]

*cough* posting anonymous because... well.. you know.


Channel Surfing == Armed Robbery (1, Flamebait)

vkg (158234) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449004)

Yeah, right... watching Buffy, then skipping over to PBS while the ads are showing is going to be illegal soon, right? Your new CBDTPA TV set is going to force you to watch shows ALL THE WAY THROUGH.

Jesus, give me a break! (no pun intended)

FINE! (5, Insightful)

gnovos (447128) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449006)

Then I'll just take my public airwaves back please... Oh, NOW who's the thief?

How about (2)

browser_war_pow (100778) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449007)

if I'm a thief of your precious IP then you're a thief of my far more valuable freedoms. Your entire business is a government created business. It cannot exist without state intervention into the economy. In a true lassiez faire nation you would not exist or would be scraping by. Don't whine and bitch and moan to me, you people are worse than welfare babies. Both you and welfare babies have to suck off the public teat for your sustinanice, but at least the welfare babies are even a little bit greatful for what society gives them. You miserable little shits expect society to hand over its cash and rights to you and then respect you and for you to not have to in any way show appreciation.

That is what I would say to that exec if I was called a thief by such a person to my face.....

what the? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449008)

I signed a contract saying I am legally required to watch all adverts they show on TV? Hmm, maybe I signed a contract with Coca Cola that I have to drink their product whenever I see a Santa Claus

He is missing something - some people like ads (2, Insightful)

kasnol (210803) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449011)

I personally like to watch commercials if they are good quality.
i.e. Nike ads etc
so if they can make ads attractive enough, ppl like me will WATCH it

Does this mean.. (5, Insightful)

ShaunC (203807) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449014)

..if I decide to watch the ads, I can quit paying money to watch cable?

I was under the impression that the money I pay to my cable company - Time Warner, which is a Turner enterprise in its own right - is passed along to the cable content providers in licensing fees. I thought that my cable subscription fee was divvied up and sent piece by piece to Showtime, E!, the Comedy channel, etc. I guess perhaps I've been wrong all these years, and Turner is giving the programming to my (Turner) cable company? That Turner isn't making a penny off the fees I pay to my cable company? Ignoring, of course, the obvious Turner-Time Warner relationship.

I really don't get it. I pay for cable programming, it has commercials. My local TV stations are free, they have commercials. Guess which channels on which I'm more likely to mute/skip commercials? Damn right - the channels I pay for.


A Clockwork Orange (3, Funny)

j09824 (572485) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449018)

What's going to be next? This [angelfire.com] ???

Um right they have a ad contract? (1)

Dudds (132159) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449021)

Ok let's see, I pay $60/month for cable. What in the world do they smoke that they think they can even PLAY ads?! It's like AOL, you pay for a service that shows you ads???

When will people realize that they are getting screwed over BIGTIME. When you pay for something, you should get it, not the ads that "come" with it.


He does have an excellent point (1)

BoBaBrain (215786) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449023)

I for one will be taking my toilet breaks during the shows from now on.

I only pray that Mr. Kellner can forgive me for my previous indiscretions.

No problem (2, Funny)

ragefan (267937) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449024)

Well, i don't bother to use my TiVo to record the lame edited movies on TBS and TNT, I'd rather watch the whole movie!!

Best "no-dishes" excuse ever (1)

SLOGEN (165834) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449029)

I'm sorry love, can't help with the dishes -- entered into a contract to watch the commercials...

Uh, what about sleep. (1)

Janitor (107737) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449030)

"I guess there's a certain amount of tolerance for going to the bathroom."

What about sleeping? I like to get a couple hours of sleep each day, am I actually stealing during that time?

You don't even need that kind of machinery (1)

JBv (25001) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449031)

I casually slip out of the living room during comercials. It's a welcome break to have a snack, go to the toilet or read some part of the boot while the TV is mute.

I never thought my kitchen, toilet and books were all part of qualified theft. Then again, I'd rather stop stealing by stopping whatching TV than by stopping eating or reading.

What's wrong with this guys in the US? Since when I am not free to choose what I see or don't see on TV? When I buy a TV, use a web browser or whatever I am under no contractual obligation to see comercials.

Ads (1)

Arsewiper (535175) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449033)

I decided a long time ago that if I could remember an ad for anything I wouldn't buy that product. It works great in supermarkets. Pick up item, remember advert (entertaining or not), put down product, find something else. It's good practice for keeping a free mind.

The fix is to solve the Jewish Problem (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449036)

Jewish media parasites continue to destroy our culture. Dr. William Pierce analyzes
the Jewish Problem in his timely and famous Internet mp3 broadcasts.

Download this week's mp3 broadcast. [natvan.com] . Be informed!

Social contract? (3, Insightful)

autopr0n (534291) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449037)

Maybe he just means 'social contract'. But still, if you can claim someone owes you anything simply for passively listening to radio waves broadcast on public spectrum unencrypted, you seriously need to reevaluate your position.

Its a bit different with cable, since you do actually sign a contract, but I doubt "must watch the adds" is a clause.

And how is this different from flipping channels, or going to the bathroom or something during a regular TV show? Or fast forwarding through commercials on a tape?

really, turner's CEO's position is really pretty tenuous...

enough is enough (2, Interesting)

kars (100858) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449040)

Now maybe if they'd only show two or three ads an hour, I wouldn't mind watching them so much...

Ad Detecting VCRs (5, Informative)

galaga79 (307346) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449042)

What about those VCRs that have mechanisms for detecting and skipping ads? They must really instill fear in the likes of Jamie Kellner and co.

After a quick Google I found an example of such device, being the Hitachi VT-FX880E that has a feature called Commercial Advantage. I am not sure how effective it is but his a snippet taken from a review [homecinemachoice.com]

If the FX880 were a computer Commercial Advantage would be described as its killer app. What it actually reflects is Hitachi ingeniously tackling the old problem of getting rid of the ads from programmes recorded from commercial TV stations. There have been attempts to do this almost from the dawn of the VCR but most have attempted to blank out the ads completely. What Commercial Advantage cleverly does is detect when an ad break starts, automatically kicks into fast forward and then drops back to normal speed when the programme resumes, all without you having to lift a finger.

It does this by detecting a signal that is sent at the beginning of each ad break which effectively returns a network to local programming so ads for that region can be shown. A signal at the end of the break marks network programming restarting and the end of the Commercial Advantage option. As with all good ideas it is deceptively simple but not without its faults. In our tests of the feature we found CA kicking in at the start of local TV promo spots (trailers, etc) that run before the advertisements themselves. Even so, it's a great idea and a genuinely useful one.

UK Broadcaster provides PVR (1)

grahammm (9083) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449043)

If the TV stations do not like PVRs why does the UK satellite broadcaster (BSkyB) offer a PVR as one of its subscription options? Or is this different (from the broadcater's pov) because the broadcaster is getting additional subscription income from the PVR users?

Media recession? (2)

einTier (33752) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449044)

Why is it that they haven't figured out that declining profits are of their own making?

Ted, let me tell you something. It's not pirates who are killing your bottom line. It's not the guys who trade your files on Kazaa or Usenet.

It's you. It's your cartel-like pricing, coupled with your outright hostility for the people who have to buy your product. GM tried this tactic in the 70's. At one time they had a greater than 50% market share. Today they are still trying to recover from their mistakes.

Keep legislating. I'll keep voting with my pocketbook. I quit buying CDs two years ago. I quit buying DVDs after a few of Jack Valenti's rants this year. If it comes down to it, I'll pull Time Warner out of the wall and only watch the media I've currently paid for and own. Turn my computer into a glorified toaster and I'll never buy another.

You know what? I'll deal. I thought getting rid of CDs would be bad. It hasn't. DVDs were even easier because I'd been down the road with CDs. Suddenly, I've got a lot more disposable income to spend on other things and other passtimes. I figure this year alone the RIAA and MPAA should save me about $5,000 with their predatory tactics.

Keep it up guys, I'm sure I'm not the only one who is spending their money on things other than your overpriced product.

Re:Media recession? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449084)

you know, thats not a bad idea. at say $50/month on cable we spend $600/year. Thats a cheap computer!

"Theft?" (1)

LMariachi (86077) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449046)

So choosing to skip an ad, whether by fast-forwarding through your Tivo's buffer or simply going to the kitchen or bathroom during breaks is "theft." So what exactly is the term for broadcasters' government-sanctioned hijacking of publicly-owned airwaves for their own profit? Everyone who wanted 17 more channels of WWF pay-per-view in lieu of HDTV that's actually HD, raise your hand.

show more live events (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449047)

I tend to watch live programs live with commercials and all.

PVRs are here to stay (2)

GutBomb (541585) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449051)

I am suprised it took this long for a broadcaster to finally come out after the PVR people for something like this. I expected it a long time ago when PVR's first hit the scene. I think that instead of putting commercial breaks between the show we will start seeing picture-in-picture commercials or we will see MUCH more product placement in shows, perhaps with the stars of the shows themselves doing advertising like the Truman Show. Either that or an annoying block of text scrolling at the bottom of the screen, however advertisers probably don't feel there is enough sex appeal in scrolling text.

The only thing I know is that PVRs are here to stay, so broadcasters are going to have to change thier business model accordingly.

I'd GLADLY steal from Turner (1)

ringbarer (545020) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449052)

After all, it was TNT that stole the good name of "Babylon 5" away from the creator with that "Crusade" abomination.

Yes, we really want to follow up five years of quality cerebral science fiction (not 'sci-fi') television with a show that features a character that greets new aliens by having sex with them.

Some of the ideas the TNT execs had for Crusade make Andromeda seem like Asimov.

When will these idiots learn,information != OBJECT (2)

HanzoSan (251665) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449053)

Information is not a physical object, it cannot be stolen.
It can be copied, shared, illegally distributed, but to call someone a thief or a pirate, is just a way of issuing out your propaganda, to make you feel morally wrong for doing whats right.

Don't touch that dial... I MEAN IT! (2)

gnovos (447128) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449054)

I wonder, does this "contract" that we have with the networks also mean that we must buy things too? What if we make a point of expressly NOT buying everything we see in commercials, would that make us thieves if we DO watch the commercials?

Once again, it's old worn-out business models running at hurricane speeds into the reenforeced concrete wall of technology and progress. If they absolutly demand that thier advertisements get seen, then start using product placement in the shows! Oh, wait, that would hurt thier lucrative syndication racket^H^H^H^H^H market. How about making thier business a micropayment one, where you pay per minute watched (with ads deducting from the bill)? Oh, that would require innovation and investment on thier part. Again, not going to happen.

As soon as all of the *cough* "Content" industries fail we may finally have a chance to see some real creative innovation in both the kinds of shows we watch and the models in which we pay for them, but until then, I'll just sit back and enjoy watching them squirm about like the stuck pigs that they are.

He can suck my ass. (1, Informative)

SensitiveMale (155605) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449057)

However he is right about the broadcastig. You 'we want everything free as beer' people need to realize that it is the advertisers that pay for the airwaves and to a large extent the internet bandwidth and the people that provide the content. You start circumventing everyway to avoid advertiseing and soon you all of the free content will be gone.

a bit far fetched (1)

fecaljapan (515606) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449058)

While I think it's a bit far fetched to say that not watching the ads is stealing, at least as far as network television goes, the ads are there for a reason. Because we get it for free. And as far as cable/satellite goes, you're paying for the service, not for the programming. The programming still needs to be paid for by ads. And while the quantity of advertising has gotten ridiculous, even abusive on some stations, there is definite pressure for more ads. The push for hdtv alone (something most stations can't really afford) will mean more ads if we actually want to see it as a reality. I personally don't care about hdtv, and I'm fine if people want to use pvrs, though I don't see the need for them, myself. If so much tv programming is crap, and it is, why bother spending money on something like that? Ads themselves are not inherently bad, but the increase in them I think is just a biproduct of other evils in the media.

and they wonder why i watch pbs... (1)

blackcoot (124938) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449060)

or any number of crud free channels... whoops -- guess i'm stealing from them 'cos i opt to watch their competition.

bathroom breaks... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449066)

Turner should prohibit me from getting up and taking a whiz during commericals too, cause i'm 'skipping' the ads.

Guilty as charged (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449067)

I'm a tivo lovin' bandit! I confess...I thumb my nose at you, you english speaking pig-dogs!!! Your mother was a hamster and your father...well, you know the rest.

Extended discussion at TivoCommunity.com... (1)

steppin_razor_LA (236684) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449069)

You might also want to check out the discussion at:

Tivo Community - Link to thread [tivocommunity.com]

There are already 4+ pages of pissed off people..

Indeed (1)

yogi (3827) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449074)

I channel surf during the adverts. Sue me.

Lawsuit time.... (1)

tktk (540564) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449078)

So why don't we accept the idea of a contract?

Then we could sue for lack of quality programming. I'd love to see the CEO's expression when he finds out about a class-act lawsuit. Who cares if the whole lawsuit is frivolous?

Of couse... I'd want my share if any settlement occurs.....

The 'Television Station' is dead (1)

Espressoman (8032) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449079)

This is exactly why this guy and everybody else working for television broadcast companies are going to be joining the unemployment line. Ahh, how I look forward to the future where I can download any program I wish via the Internet, right from the production company for a few lousy bucks. Yay for progress.

Anyway it dosn't matter. (2)

autopr0n (534291) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449080)

5 years from now, there will be no commercial breaks. They will just stick a huge banner on the screen all the time like CNN/Fox news do now but with adverts. I guarantee it.

Well, actually they will probably still have commercial breaks. Fat lazy Americans who spend all their time in front of the TV will complain because they need to have pee breaks.

This is quite different from us intellectual people who spend all their time surfing slashdot/k5/fark/etc and have the luxury of urinating whenever we want to.

yawn (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449081)

Come on, this is the fuckwhit who brought us "The WB"

Yeah, I was shows just for the ads (1)

Hyperfrog (575345) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449085)

Since when have we made contracts with the broadcasters for watching their content?

More to the point: Since when do people actually watch ads? Ads are designed to be forced down our throats.. and most people go out of their way not to watch them (channel surfing, pop up blockers). If they fail for whatever reason - tough shit.

I love these morons... (5, Insightful)

MrHat (102062) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449086)

I'm sure they wouldn't mind producing this 'contract', then. What's that? I didn't sign a contract? Well, that's interesting. Perhaps they meant 'broken business model' and not 'contract'.

Additionally, maybe this fucktard Kellner can explain how I go about stealing something I've already paid for. I'd love to hear that one.

I swear to God, the year that we perfect a method to endlessly duplicate food will be the year in which half of the US population starves to death.

In the rare chance that Slashdot is still here when that happens, I'll post an 'I told you so' message. I'll be the one with a shotgun and a food duplicator, hiding in my basement, posting from the only Apple IIe that survived the circumvention crackdown of 2015. I'm saving this link. I expect a +5.

Big deal.... so I am thief! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3449087)

My directivo is connect to a pc running emulation software anyway. Also I have the extreme2.5 drive image and am testing the tivo sub as well.

If you think calling me a thief for skipping commericials is a big deal.... sheesh, I steal DirecTV and Tivo service man!

So the next hit game will be... (1)

jabapi (548478) | more than 12 years ago | (#3449092)

... called GTA (Grand Theft Advertisement)! Crush the economy by moving around the town and not looking at the ads.
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