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Peek Into European Patent Examining Cancelled

Roblimo posted more than 12 years ago | from the you-can't-always-get-what-you-want dept.

Patents 214

We were going to run European Patent Examiner John Savage's answers to 10 Slashdot questions today, but he emailed us this morning and asked us to pull them back because he was was in trouble over the interview. What he had to say was informative, non-controversial, and would not have hurt his employer's reputation at all, but we don't want John to lose his job or face disciplinary action on our account. Anyway, get ready for a slightly unusual Slashdot interview guest next week: Celeb chef and self-described "culinary cartographer" Alton Brown.

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well, just great (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039649)

fp

-21 Karma, FAGS (-1)

ManBeef (576292) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039655)

\m/ \m/ \m/

you lightweight (-1)

Sexual Asspussy (453406) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039710)

As the daylight broke, I found myself in a hot lust filled dream. A beautiful man was giving my cock an incredible round of servicing. Up and down my hard shaft. And in that dream I suddenly found light pressure against my lips as my faceless lover lightly pressed his dick toward my mouth. The tip glistened with pre-cum and had a familiar and pleasant salty-sweet taste.

As I started to awaken from my dream sleep I quickly became aware that it was not a dream at all. My boyfriend, my lover of three years, Nate was positioned over me in an inviting 69 position. I had met Nate at school as an 18 year-old freshman who had just come out to my family and close friends. He, too, was newly "out" and we stuck up a friendship that had grown into a love affair. We became roommates in the second semester and had shared rooms, lives, and a passion for each other ever since.

As sophomores we moved off campus and had found a one-bedroom apartment. We shared a king-sized bed and always slept naked together. Nate has a cock that I can only call beautiful. It's thick, cut, and a healthy 7" when erect. Nate keeps his slim body wonderfully toned and totally hairless. Though he's 21 years old, he has the slim hairless body of a 13 year old. He is an incredible turn-on visually and is one of the greatest cocksuckers I've ever met.

As I looked up from still half-opened eyes, his fully erect dick was mere millimeters from my face. Coming to my senses, I opened my mouth and welcomed the object of my sexual desire inside. Nate and I then treated one another to beautiful, lustful blow jobs.

Because I know Nate so intimately, I sensed his approaching orgasm, and concentrated even harder in pleasuring my svelte lover. Seconds later, the familiar grunt and moan signaled that his load had been dispatched and would soon be filling my mouth. As expected, he filled me with his cream while I milked his cock for every drop of his love potion. Sucking for all I was worth, I felt my own approaching orgasm. And just as that familiar tingling began at the bottom of my balls, Nate pulled off my cock and said, "Hold on, my love, you're going to need that load later." He immediately jumped out our bed and headed for the shower.

"That's ONE!" he called from the bathroom. "What do you mean, Sweetheart?" I inquired. "What does ONE mean?"

"You'll see," he said as he emerged from the bathroom; the shower running and getting warm.

He walked over to the bed, leaned over, and gave me a kiss like only intimate lovers can share. "Happy birthday, Bri. I love you." As we broke our kiss he said, "as soon as you shower, we're out of here. We've got a birthday celebration to end them all."

"Really?" I asked. "Who is 'we'?"

"You'll find out soon enough," Nate replied as I heard him step into the shower.

Laying on the bed awaiting my turn in the shower, I closed my eyes to contemplate the wonderful blow job I had just enjoyed giving to my lover, still tasting the musky sweetness on my lips. I considered by own gratification that had gone unsatisfied. Dreaming of my lover and still savoring his taste, I rested for a few moments waiting for Nate to finish his shower.

I must have dozed for a few moments, because I was suddenly brought back to consciousness by a familiar warm, dampness surrounding my still semi-erect cock. I opened my eyes to see our neighbor, Mike, stark naked, kneeling over me and bringing my cock back to life. Standing behind him was his roommate and lover, Scott. Mike and Scott shared the apartment directly across the hall from us. We knew they were gay lovers and Mike and Scott knew that Nate and I were gay lovers. Oftentimes, we'd rent gay pornos on a weekend and the four of us would watch them together. It never failed that the movies always ended with each of us having hot sex on the living room floor with our lover. Up until now, though, Nate nor I had ever had sex with Mike or Scott.

Mike was an expert cocksucker along the same vein as my precious Nate. He serviced me and coaxed me toward orgasm, but always stopping just short of allowing me to cum. As the expert blowjob continued, Scott, climbed up on the bed and strattled my face. His semi-erect 7 inch dick, glistening with pre-cum, pulsating just inches from my mouth. As the sexual tension continued to build, I could wait no longer, I hungrily swallowed Scott's gorgeous tool. In a matter of minutes, he poured his hot jism down my throat. What an incredible flavor he offered.

I, on the otherhand, was aching to shoot my own load, but the expert who was servicing my meat would not let me go over the edge. As Scott dismounted, Mike stopped sucking and re-positioned himself above my face and offered me HIS 6 inch, thick meat. As Scott went to clean up, Nate emerged from the shower and announced, "That's TWO, birthday boy!"

I sucked Mike for all I was worth. Having no mouth on my own cock, I reached down and began jacking myself off, hoping, wanting, and needing to get off. After two or three stokes, someone grabbed my hand and removed it from my dick. "Nope, Brian, you don't get to cum yet. There's too much yet to do," Nate announced.

I dutifully kept my hands off my pulsating cock, and continued to fellate my handsome neighbor. Mike as 19, and very slim. He had cleancut, boyish features, and would be regarded as a fem by some. But, to me he was a beautiful young creature. I worked on his chubby, filled with the desire to taste his semen.

I licked his balls and the underside of his fat dick. "Brian, I'm gonna cum!" he shouted. "I'm cumming. I'm cummmmmmminnnnnnggggg!" That skinny young lad shot a load in my mouth like none other I'd ever had. He came in spurts, some of which ran down the side of my mouth. I couldn't swallow it all. As he dismounted, Mike bent down and gave me a soft, wonderful kiss. He swept his tongue across my lips, trying to taste his own juices. He licked the side of my mouth and my cheeks, licking up every drop of jism that I had not been able to keep in my mouth. What a turn-on it was to watch and feel this gorgeous man eat his own cum.

"That's THREE!" cried Nate. "Now get yourself out of bed and jump in the shower. We've all taken off work and we're gonna have a huge day today.!" "One more thing, Bri. Don't even think of cumming just yet. You'll need that load later.

"Jesus," I thought to myself. I was on the verge of cumming without even touching myself. I was about to bust. But, at the same time, I knew that if I did what my friend and lover Nate asked me to do, I would be justly rewarded sooner or later.

I must have set a record for a quick shower. I was in and out in about three minutes. I quickly dressed and prepared to leave.

As we were getting ready to walk out the door, the apartment's doorbell rang. I opened the door and was greeted by Damon. Damon was my best friend from junior high and high school. We had virtually grown up together. Damon was a hot dude and always had a cheerleader or other gorgeous girl for a girlfriend. Damon was a football player, basketball player, and musician in the school's band. He had always been popular with both the girls and guys. Damon is a true friend. During the times that I was struggling to find my sexual identity, Damon was there for me. When I was starting to deal with the possibility of discovering my homosexuality, Damon just listened to me. He never put me down, and he never was repulsed when I shared my feelings with him. Though he was as straight as an arrow, Damon was the best friend a gay guy could ever have. He is always interested in me and my love life. My being gay is just as normal to Damon as being straight is to him.

"Happy Birthday, Bri!" Damon proclaimed as he walked in the door. He came forward and gave me a friendly hug. "I'm your chauffeur today for your birthday trip."

"Well, then let's haul ass!" announced Nate. He kissed me on the lips, grabbed my hand and led our troupe out the door to Damon's van.

"Let the festivities begin!" proclaimed Damon as he pointed the large conversion van toward the interstate. In a matter of minutes, we had come to Interstate 64 and started motoring east towards Mt. Vernon. A few miles past the Scott AFB exit, we pulled off at the Mid-America Airport exit, turned left, and then turned left again and got back on the interstate heading back towards St. Louis. Moments later, we pulled off at a rest stop. We pulled to a stop and Nate jumped out. "I gotta go to the bathroom. Anyone else need to go?"

"Hell, no, Nate!" I replied. "We just left the apartment 10 minutes ago!"

Damon's conversion van was a full sized model with two captain's chairs behind the driver and passenger and a bench seat across the back. It was plush, comfortable and extremely roomy. One could easily sleep in the van if forced to on a long trip. Three or four minutes passed before the side door came open and Nate stood at the opening. "Look what I found for you, birthday boy!" Nate stated proudly. Standing beside him was a handsome fellow in his mid-twenties. Sandy blond hair, medium build, wire-rimmed glasses, white t-shirt and lightweight khaki shorts set off this 5'9" young gent. He was well tanned and had a blue bandana tied around his neck.

"This is Jordan, Brian," announced Nate. "He has something for you."

At this, fair-haired Jordan climbed into the van and joined me on the back bench. Sitting down next to me, he immediately leaned forward and kissed me firmly on the lips while taking his right hand and reaching for my crotch. With his left hand, he expertly unzipped his pants and a seven inch uncut cock sprung forth. I love foreskins, and this one was extra special, for on the underside of his cock, just below the head, his foreskin was pierced and held a ? inch gold hoop. What a sexy site it was.

We broke the kiss and I reached toward this beautiful piece of manhood while Jordan continued to fish for my own penis, which was growing hard for the fourth time in this young day. "Maybe they'll let me cum this time," I thought to myself.

Jordan stood up in the van as best he could. Still in much of a crouch, he took his bulging and pulsing cock into his hands and held it before me. I inhaled to experience the musky aroma. My mouth watered with anticipation as I looked at the beautiful dick before me, bouncing with every beat of Jordan's pulse.

Throwing all caution to the wind, I threw myself forward and took his entire cock, hoop ring and all, into my mouth and down my throat. I was completely overcome with lust as my appetite for cock became uncontrollable. I suddenly found myself a cock crazed animal. All I could think about was having cock, cock and more cock. I had to have Jordan and I had to taste his spooge oozing down my throat. Nothing else mattered. I gave the blowjob of my life as I teased him, licking his shaft, taking his balls into my mouth, and licking the sensitive underside of his manhood. Soon a drop of pre-cum appeared on the tip of Jordan's dick. My pointed tongue immediately targeted the slit and I orally milked every molecule of pre-cum from his dick that I possibly could. It was sweet, and oh so delicious. I had to have more. At this particular moment, my own sexual gratification and pending orgasm was put on hold. My sole purpose for my next breath was to entice a hot load of spunk out of this hot little man's throbbing bone

And just like that, he was gone.

"What is this, some kind of countdown?" I asked.

"As a matter of fact, it is" replied my straight buddy Damon. "We're giving you a '21 Gun Salute' to celebrate your 21st birthday. The fourth gun just fired!" The van full of four other men, all friends and loved ones, erupted in laughter.

"Oh, my, what a gift!" was all I could say. "Twenty-one cocks? All in one day?"

"Yes, sir!" answered Damon. Though he was straight as an arrow, I loved this man because he was so open minded with my gay lifestyle. How supportive could a friend possibly be?

The van continued to be filled with laughter, which was suddenly interrupted by a knock on the sliding door. We had been so busy conversing and enjoying one another's company that we did not see the guy walk up. He was a young, tall, African-American fellow. Somewhere between 18 and 22 years old, I would've guessed. Dressed in a baggy white FUBU undershirt, a single gold chain around his neck, a clean, white sweatband around his head and some low-riding baggy shorts were set off by black, high-tech tennis shoes.

Mike lowered the window. "Hey, man. I hear a man can get his dick sucked in here. Any truth to that?"

Still in my cock starved state, my single response was, "You better believe it. Get in here in the back!"

Without hesitation, the door slid open and the young, chocolate colored Adonis stepped in.

"I don't have time for small talk or chit-chat," I heard myself saying. "Just get in here and feed me that ebony cock of yours!"

The low-riding shorts came down easy, as did the silk boxers. True to my wildest expectation, the young stud was packing about 9 inches of brown love tool. I dove for the object of my current lust and commenced to deep throat the whole thing.

Men have often commented on my cocksucking prowess, and this was no different. Sounds of pleasure escaped the lips of this beautiful ebony god. The mere size of his dick would have been intimidating under normal circumstances, but my animalistic need to feast on cocks of any size or shape threw all inhibitions out the window. Nothing at the time could possibly compare to the feel of his cock sliding between my lips and down my throat. Occasionally I would remove his cock from my mouth and lick, nibble and kiss the underside of his shaft. I would gently take his scrotum in my teeth and seek to take one of his massive balls into my mouth. He enjoyed the service I was so happily providing him, but my animal instincts mandated that I have that gorgeous chunk of meet stuffed in my mouth.

My sheer drive to receive his seed caused me to provide this young brown cock an expert oral servicing. In no time, his moaning, his breathing, and his thrusting motion let me know that he was about to shoot his hot load. A short, masculine scream was the only prelude to the sticky load that erupted from his gun. It's taste was delightfully delicious. After two bursts of his wonderful ejaculation, my black lover of the moment hastily pulled his still hard cock from my mouth, stuffed in back into his pants and quickly turned to leave. His only words were, "That's FIVE, motherfucker." And he was gone.

I was left in another terrible state. It was just a bit past 9:00 in the morning. I had sucked five gorgeously different cocks and was carrying five loads of semen in my stomach. And yet, my own crescendoed sexual tension had gone unsatisfied. I had to cum. Soon.

A few minutes to clean up and tidy up and our van was soon cruising westward back towards St. Louis. Moments later, the van slowed down and we pulled of Highway 159 and up to the giant shopping mall. Because it was not yet 10:00 a.m. there were just a handful of cars in the expansive parking lot. We pulled up to the north side of the mall. Scott led us from the van to a side door that was apparently a back entrance to one of the hundreds of shops. "What is this guy up to?" I thought to myself.

"Time for your first birthday gift, Brian. This one comes with love from Mike and me." Scott knocked on the door and a moment later it opened.

"Hi, Mike. We've been expecting you," said the twenty-something greeter. He welcomed Mike with a hug and a kiss on the lips. He greeted everyone else with a handshake, a hand on the shoulders and a "Welcome, please do come in." He finally turned to me and said, "And this must be the guest of honor. Hi, I'm Ryan. I'm the store manager. Your friends have arranged this private shopping experience prior to our opening just for you. I hope you enjoy yourself."

I was led in and discovered that we had come into the back room of one of the hippest and trendiest men's fashion shops in the entire city. Cutting edge and extreme fashion surrounded us on the walls and the many floor racks. I was led to the center of the store that contained several large easy chairs and a bank of mirrors. Just behind were a series of several dressing rooms.

"Mike and I are getting you some new threads for your birthday. You try them on. We'll pick them out, and pay for them, and you enjoy them," announced Scott.

Ryan, the store manager, was joined by another employee. "Brian, this is Mitch. He'll be assisting me in measuring you and selecting your fashions today. Now, Brian, won't you please stand and let's get you fixed up."

I stood before the two clothiers. Ryan and Mitch both held tape measures. They promptly went to work and started measuring and recording my waist, inseam, sleeve length, neck size, chest, and so forth. "Okay, Brian, now we need you to remove all your clothes so we can fit you in your first outfit."

I willingly obliged the hunky salesman. He was cute, bleached-blonde, slim, and talked with a slight lisp. I then learned that the lisp was caused by a huge stud that had been inserted into his pierced tongue. Upon a closer look, I also learned that Ryan was pierced in the eyebrow and both ears held multiple piercings. It was indeed a sexy site. I stripped down to my socks and underwear and waited for Ryan and Mitch to emerge from the backroom. Only Ryan returned, and upon seeing me he repeated, "Brian, I asked you to remove all your clothes. I did mean all of them, please, sir."

Hell, by this time of the day, my friends had either been orally serviced by me or had watched me suck sufficient cock. All inhibitions were gone. I removed by Calvin Klein briefs and socks and stood before my four friends and lovers and Ryan. Ryan saw me in all of my naked glory and stopped for a moment just to look me over. "My, oh my. You are a cute one, Brian." He reached up and tweaked one of my nipples. Mitch then emerged from the back room. He was carrying a white knit shirt with red stripes and some black leather pants. Oh yes. And he was totally naked as he delivered the first ensemble.

His cock was hard and standing out, almost parallel to the ground. He wasn't as big as any of the other dicks I'd seen today, but his body was completely shorn of hair. He had no pubes, and the site of his hairless body was a turn on.

"Let's try that shirt," announced Ryan. I reached out to accept the shirt in order to put it on, but Ryan insisted that he dress me himself. I held my arms outward and upward and he slipped the shirt onto my arms. This was exquisite cotton material that felt soft and airy. As he pulled the shirt down and had it covering my head, he stopped for just a second. During that second, I felt lips surround themselves around my exposed cock. As Ryan finished pulling the shirt into place I looked down to see Mitch fellating my pounding dick. It was obvious that he knew what he was doing and enjoyed what he was doing. The shirt fit tight and accentuated my torso, showing off my tight stomach and broad shoulders. As good as the shirt felt, it was nothing compared to the ecstatic sensation of the tight lipped cock sucker paying homage to my dick. I stood, weak legged, and eyes closed savoring the complete feeling of total pleasure. Orgasm was just seconds away.

Suddenly Mitch stopped and inched away from my throbbing meat. He remained in a kneeling position and started to jerk his own cock and masturbate before me. Without a word, Ryan stepped before me with a pair of soft leather pants, offering them for me to step into. I lifted the right leg and then the left and stepped into the ultra soft calf skin slacks. He pulled them up over my thighs and around my waist. Before fastening them, Ryan informed me that, "these are party pant, Brian. You see they have a double zipper. This allow you to keep the waist band fastened and yet unzip, and have your cock out and remain so without discomfort. You'll love that feature. In fact. Let us demonstrate how they work."

Ryan fumbled with the twin zippers for a moment and then pulled the buttery leather pants the rest of the way up and secured the waist band. With the double zipper open, the pants lived up to Ryan's description. My pants were in position, and my pulsating cock was comfortably exposed. Mitch crawled back over and resumed his task where he had left off a few minutes ago. He swallowed my dick down his throat. He gently pushed me back and into one of the big easy chairs. I leaned back into the chair and allowed myself to be treated to a fantastic blowjob. As I slunk back into the oversized chair, Ryan quickly disrobed and climbed onto the arms of the chair facing me. He offered his gorgeous 7 inch cock to my hungry mouth.

Now animal lust took complete control of my body. A talented mouth sucked on my pulsating member while I provided simultaneous service to Ryan's incredible penis. In just a couple of minutes, Ryan let out a manly groan and spilled his load onto my tongue. I felt its' heat run down my throat. What a great throat soother this stuff is! Mitch continued working on me and orgasm again approached. Ryan then removed his softening dick from my mouth and got down off the chair. He and Mitch then traded places. Ryan knelt before me and Mitch mounted the chair's arms, grabbed his dick in his right hand and shook it before my face. I opened wide and received his hairless heater. Ryan's pierced tongue was amazing. He worked that studded tongue up and down my shaft. When he took my dickhead into his mouth, the stud tickled the underside of my cock just beneath the head. What a sensation. Meanwhile, Mitch was thrusting in unision with the bobbing of my head.

"God, guys. Please let me cum this time. I'm gonna explode!" was all I could say.

"Okay," answered Nate.

That was all I needed. With the permission of my lover, I felt a physical, emotional, and mental release like I never before had experienced. Every nerve in my body was completely sensitive to what was happening. The combination of Mitch's shaved dick in my mouth and Ryan's pierced tongue working my own dick finally put me over the edge. As Mitch began pouring his load into my mouth, I finally released my own and ejaculated into the back of Ryan's throat. It was perhaps the most intense orgasm I had ever felt.

Thanks to good advanced planning, Ryan and Mitch had plenty of things on hand to help us clean up after our love session. With only minutes until the store was to open, my two newest lovers scurried around the store and put together three other ensembles for me. I kept the hot shirt and double-zippered leather pants on for our next stop. They helped me to accessorize the outfit with a studded leather choker and matching leather bracelets. They also set me up with the proper shoes and socks. No underwear, though. "Underwear is not allowed in this store," Ryan informed. As the other items were wrapped and the bill paid, Ryan and Mitch stepped forward. They each held a gift-wrapped box. "Happy birthday, Brian. Here's a little something from me. Now don't be a stranger." He handed me the box and gave me a sexy, tonsil tickling kiss.

Mitch stepped forward. "This is the pants to match what Ryan gave you. Happy birthday, Brian." Followed by another incredible kiss.

As we prepared to step out of the back door of the store, everyone exchanged hand-shakes, hugs and some kisses. As I turned to leave, Mitch stepped forth and said, "That's SIX." Ryan leaned forward and whispered to me, "That's SEVEN." "Let's do it again soon."

Slashdot Beatitudes (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039657)

And seeing the multitudes, He went up unto the mountain: and when He was set, his disciples came unto him: And He opened his mouth, and taught them, saying,

"Blessed are the poor in threshold: for theirs is the Kingdom of the Page-Lengthening and Page-Widening Posts.

"Blessed are they that mourn the death of *BSD: for they shall be comforted with an ultradense Linux server from VA Linux, now sold by California Digital Corporation.

"Blessed are the posters of smug one-liners: for they shall inherit an Account Capped at 50.

"Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after The First Post: for they shall have the Third or Fourth Post.

"Blessed are the karma whores: for they shall obtain "Score: 5, Insightful".

"Blessed are those who dismiss out-of-hand: for they shall fail to see the Point of the Original Post.

"Blessed are those who seek to associate themselves with the latest techno-fad: for they shall be called 3L33T for at least Another Half Hour.

"Blessed are they which are persecuted for their own self-righteousness' sake: for theirs is the Kingdom of "Ask Slashdot".

"Blessed are the over-eager, who believe that Open Source is a social movement heralding the rise of a new generation: for they shall not realize that There Are No Sacred Cows.

"Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for the sake of your Favorite Operating System.

"Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in Heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.

THIS IS THE WORD OF THE LORD

THANKS BE TO GOD (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039685)

You Are Evil!!!! :) (-1, Troll)

kenp2002 (545495) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039884)

You obviously religious doctrine is not sensitive to the needs of pagans, athiests, agnostics.

You post is offensive to Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Confucian Philosophers, Taoists, Buhdists, Wiccans, Scientologists, Gnostics, Masons, Satanists, New Dawn Members, Mormons, Jehova Wittnesses, Secularists, Monitaianism (A Term for Money Wrorshipers)

You post is an affront to the following economic\political systems: Capitalism, Socialism, Communism, Anarchsim, the Fordian Society, The Orwelling Society, Unitary Federalism, Fachism, and other misc. 'ISMs.

You post is racialy offensive to the following non-existent racial groups: Blacks, African Americans, Hispanics, Mexicans, Latinos, Spanish-Americans, Asians, Orientals, Chinese, Chinese-American, Japanese, Japanese Americans, Nise, Korean Americans, Koreans, Hawaiian-American, Vietnames , American-Vietnames, Indians, India-Americans, Native American, American Idians, Anglo-saxon, Anglo-Normans, whites, Eastern Europeans, medditeranian-americans, english-americans, scottish-americans, irish-americans, africans, arab-americans, egyptians, Kiwi, Kiwi-Americans (New Zeland), Austrian-Americans, Tazmainian-Americans, Morracan-Americas, Barzilian-Americans, and any other sensitive cultures I may have forgotten about.

You post is sexually discriminating against: males, females, hermaphridiates, she-males, he-shes, gay males, gay females, celebete males, celebate females, and various non-specific or unidentifiable sexes that may or may not exist in nature including but no limited to Virtual Life-forms, such as Sims and Mobs. Also your post neglects to have sensitivity towards non-life based organisms such as Viruses.

You post is intellectually discriminating against: stupid people, dumb people, ignorant people, ill-informed people, lazy people, brain dead people, and non-thinking objects (such as rocks).

You post is discriminating against people of challenge including: blind people, illerate people
and people that cannot focus for more than 10 seconds (ADD and ADHA).

You post is economically discriminating against people who cannot afford computers or do not have time to read your post.

You post is also discriminatory to those that read right to left versus left to right

In summary: KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!

Well... (2, Funny)

CarrionBird (589738) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039661)

I guess we can infer their stance on the issues: our decisions are definitive, reality is often in error.

Super (4, Insightful)

Quintin Stone (87952) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039666)

Nice to know that informing and educating people about a legal process can put you in danger of losing your job.

Re:Super (5, Insightful)

Tackhead (54550) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039814)

> Nice to know that informing and educating people about a legal process can put you in danger of losing your job.

Well, we got one answer -- the one someone asked about US patent examiners, along the lines of: "How does it feel to work for people who have their heads jammed that far up their asses?"

Looks like the EU patent office prefers a close-up view of its own colon to reality, too.

The examiner's manager has done more damage to the EU patent office's reputation than any answer the examiner could have given.

Re:Super (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039866)

Typical european Wuss. Why do all those foreigners wimp out. Historically, any countryman other than someone in the great United States of America, pusses out. Linus is too wimpy to take charge of his OS and the Open Sorce movement. Someone says there is no history You want history, hell france, italy, and the united kingdom and ireland were fucked in WWII until the US moved in and kicked the kaisers ass. And what about the canadiasians (members of the 8 northernmost soon-to-be United States), they (were) are protected from invasion due to the greatest military superpower in the World. Typical. He is probably a homosexual. No, he is a homosexual, a foreigner homosexual.

Are doo bee yah ess ?

Re:Super (0, Offtopic)

geekster (87252) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039909)

blah blah blah... are you done?

Re:Super (1)

Tablizer (95088) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039961)

Nice to know that informing and educating people about a legal process can put you in danger of losing your job.

Well, I personally never found truth and employment to be compatible either.

Too bad (1)

hether (101201) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039671)

It's too bad he can't answer our questions for fear of penalty, but I don't know what there is to say about it other than darn.

politics (1, Insightful)

dattaway (3088) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039673)

Looks like his employer was owned by big businesses and was not in the interest of the public.

Re:politics (3, Redundant)

Telastyn (206146) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039714)

Not necissarily. Most companies actually require that employees not say anything publically that could be construed as being "from the company", even though they're just from an employee. Basically only marketting shmoes "trained in the process" can speak to the public.

Most all statements "from the company" are passed through PR people and lawyers to make sure the company doesn't get in trouble for liabelous comments made by an employee.

That's what more likely happened, just more sue-fearing rather than business manipulation.

Re:politics (1)

Eccles (932) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039803)

Most companies actually require that employees not say anything publically that could be construed as being "from the company"

But this guy works for the government, not a company. Typically they're harder to sue.

Re:politics (2)

jmu1 (183541) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039933)

Simple reply to that one... does he have an NDA... prolly not. Could he have just as easily said: "This in no way reflects the views of my employer or their employers."

I'd say this guy's employer just did his company a disservice.

Re:politics (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039731)

how is this insightful? i can't even begin to describe.

That sucks. (5, Insightful)

Skyshadow (508) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039677)

You have to wonder what PR brainiac came up with the idea of censoring an interview like this. Anything this guy had to say couldn't possibly look as bad as this does, unless it's on the lines of "we kill puppies and cute little kittens to make mittens".

Now, everyone will just be wondering what they're hiding...

Re:That sucks. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039698)

Now, everyone will just be wondering what they're hiding...

By "everyone", you must mean "tinfoil hat wearing slashbots".

Seriously, organizations have PR departments for a reason. The Patent Office PR staff doesn't try to approve patents (and they wouldn't be allowed to if the tried) for a reason. This guy doesn't do PR (and isn't allowed to if he tries) for a reason.

Re:That sucks. (1)

John Sullivan (234934) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039881)

By "everyone", you must mean "tinfoil hat wearing slashbots".

Oooh, bitchy. I think it's only natural and sensible to ask what they're up to, and to ask harder the harder they try not to tell you. I'm not suggesting a crusade against them, but their work has a direct effect on many of us here, so it is in the public interest for them to be open about their processes.

This guy doesn't do PR (and isn't allowed to if he tries) for a reason.

Which is unfortunate, because what most probably wanted was insights into the way they work, which you almost certainly would not get from a PR rep. As you say, PR staff don't approve patents, so what's the point in asking them how or why patents are approved? We are a technically minded audience and want technically rich answers which they would be less likely to be able to provide.

Re:That sucks. (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039812)

I modded you up because I got excited with the talk of killing puppies [rotten.com] and cute kittens [bonsaikitten.com] ... But I guess that wasn't really the point of your comment... Ah well.

thats good!! (-1, Offtopic)

RestonVA (593792) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039678)

for me to poop on!

disappointed (1)

tiedyejeremy (559815) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039681)

I was very interested A) to see what questions would be allowed to be asked, and B)to hear what he had to say. I guess their methods for patent approval are patented and, therefore, cannot be discussed in an open forum. Probably afraid the US Gov't would sue or bomb over pointed answers about the US system.

I'd like a better explanation of the cancellation.

Re:disappointed (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039700)

Uh, he's a European patent examiner for the European Patent Office... :-p

read the comment (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039733)

the person to whom you replied was obviously aware that the parent examiner is European. try reading the comment again.

*tard.

-ac

Re:disappointed (2)

Safety Cap (253500) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039735)

Excatly, and that means he knows better than to question the US Government [streamos.com] [real player]

Re:disappointed (1)

tiedyejeremy (559815) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039769)

yes, I am informed. Reading the previous discussion, I saw that many of the questions posed were about comparissons between the European and US agencies.

above carefully reworded to keep from being an assh0)e. :)

Re:disappointed (3, Informative)

sphealey (2855) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039893)

I was very interested A) to see what questions would be allowed to be asked, and B)to hear what he had to say. I guess their methods for patent approval are patented and, therefore, cannot be discussed in an open forum.
If you have ever dealt with the ISO, the ITU, or the EU regulatory bodies, you know that description isn't too far from the truth. North American regulatory bodies may well be captured by the regulated parties, but at least you as a citizen have some right-to-know and to participate. Europe perfers that these processes occur in a controlled environment.

sPh

Translation (1, Offtopic)

rhadamanthus (200665) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039694)

"What he had to say was informative, non-controversial, and would not have hurt his employer's reputation at all"

That damn lameness filter! I don't think its caught a truely "lame" post yet!

-------rhad

re: Alton Brown (2)

topham (32406) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039696)

Any chance the interview will be an MP3 clip?

Re: Alton Brown (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039708)

Any chance the interview will be an MP3 clip?


Of course! After all, he didn't respond to an email with the questions answered, and asked for the previous story to be pulled. However, he will certainly get one of his buddies to read him the questions, answer them, record the whole session, and make it available to the world! Why didn't I think of that?

Re: Alton Brown (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039938)

After all, he didn't respond to an email with the questions answered

What the hell are you talking about?

Since the interview with Alton Brown hasn't been run yet, how the hell could he not respond?

Way to read the subject line, dude.

Re: Alton Brown (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4040002)

try posting the thread in the CORRECT FUCKING ARTICLE you fucking idiots. this is about the EU patent office interview. The alton brown bullshit (whoever the fuck that is) is in a completely different article.

bunch of fucking assholes... learn to post in the right place

Re: Alton Brown (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039766)

Don't you mean an Ogg Vorbis clip?

Don't use PATENT-ENCUMBERED software!

Possible action? (3, Interesting)

Corporate Troll (537873) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039705)

Would there be a way to put some pressure to the European Patent Office? After all we are thousands of voices...
And, no, I don't mean pressure in DoS style. More something like a petition.

Re:Possible action? (1)

BrianWCarver (569070) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040065)

I'd rather see some e-mail addresses of people we could write there. The Slashdot Effect on someone's inbox is likely a great way of making someone see that allowing a little interview isn't nearly as problematic as dealing with thousands of angry nerds.

Brian

Heh... (1)

The Evil Beaver (175641) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039713)

I guess now we'll realize that their patent system is just as screwed up as America's, but the hard way. :P

What were the questions???? (4, Interesting)

xjimhb (234034) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039732)

It might be interesting to publish a list of the questions chosen for this. It would give us more insight into what they're trying to hide, even if we don't get to see the answers.

Re:What were the questions???? (3, Informative)

demaria (122790) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039968)

read the 4 & 5 comments from here. [slashdot.org] That'll tell you.

hey roblimo-- (1)

jeffy124 (453342) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039741)

do you think you could at least post the questions that you sent his way? mayne then we could all get an idea of what trouble might have been caused.

Good idea. (2)

quantaman (517394) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039744)

This will really make his employer look great!

Celeb chef Alton Brown (2, Funny)

clem (5683) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039751)

What the hell? Is /. slowly becoming the online equivalent of 'Good Morning America'?

Re:Celeb chef Alton Brown (1)

tiedyejeremy (559815) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039789)

don't forget: Guest cancellations to protect reputations... You may be on track.

Re:Celeb chef Alton Brown (1)

boomer_rehfield (579777) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039820)

Look around /. There was an earlier article that explained why. He uses scientific approches to cooking and it was actually quite informative. You'd really have to read it.

Re:Celeb chef Alton Brown (1)

schon (31600) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039958)

He uses scientific approches to cooking

Bingo - this man is the main reason I get the Food network..

Not only does he explain the science of food, but he does it in an entertaining manner (he was a video director before he was a chef..)

I loved his "Scrap Iron Chef" episode... a parody of Junkyard Wars and Iron Chef..

Re:Celeb chef Alton Brown (2)

Amazing Quantum Man (458715) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039846)

He's a geek. Now if it had been Emeril, that would have been another story...

Come on, though... We really want an interview with either Kaga or the Iron Chefs Morimoto and Sakai!

Re:Celeb chef Alton Brown (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039917)

Yes. Albeit a (more) shoddily produced one.

Sex kitten on KDE-look (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039756)

Some ones took the sex kitten [kde-look.org] from Oralse.cx [oralse.cx] and turned it into a kde splash screen! Yove just got to laugh! I hope they make a goatse one too.

Re:Sex kitten on KDE-look (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4040041)

shutup, norman

Not surprising (5, Informative)

Pig Hogger (10379) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039758)

I sent the /. URL to an EU patent examiner I know, and he answered back that the guy has lots of balls to do this, because he could get in lots of trouble for speaking publicly...

He also said that the questions weren't very good either...

the questions (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039800)

They all seemed very US Europe has a reasonably different patent system (you can't patent tieing a bow in you hair and crap like that)

Not really surprising (4, Informative)

gmcraff (61718) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039770)

A lot of big organizations, such as corporations, government agencies, etc, and those smaller agencies descended from them, tend to want tight control over the information going out.

Not knowing anything about this situation in particular, but from my experience I'd say the trouble came about because the answers weren't gone over by their Public Affairs and Legal weenies before he sent them out.

If they HAD been white-washed by Legal and PA, then something in the answers must have worried someone. Don't forget that anything that comes from someone associated with an organization is assumed "expert opinion" and "official policy" even if the first two statements in the matter directly refute those assumptions.

Alternatively, someone's boss may have an excessively high cover-my-arse quotient and decided to play it by the safest method: Don't tell 'em nothin', and they won't have anythin' on yeh. We don't have a grand conspiracy here, just ordinary every day middle-management pucker factor.

Shouldn't be surprising... (3, Informative)

billbaggins (156118) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039775)

...most gov't agencies don't like it when someone who's not a Trained Professional Media Handler talks to the media while mentioning their standing as a gov't employee, Just In Case they say something that three years down the road is proved false or, worse yet, embarrassing. A better way to do it would be to have employees watch their tongues, but blanket policies are the way gov't orgs work, alas...

(Speaking as a former gov't employee...)

Re:Shouldn't be surprising... (2)

RGRistroph (86936) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040001)

A better way to do it would be for employers to simply disclaim false statements from a low level employee as just that, false statements from a low level employee. But because we impose no cost on them for being extremist censors and gag-artists, they push the boundaries as far as possible.

Don't be coddling these management practices. While you are right that some of them wouldn't have been invented if employees used a bit of common sense occasionally in terms of speculating about what they didn't know, spreading rumours, etc, that doesn't mean these practices are detrimental to society and weaken the organization itself in the long run.

If the management of the European Patent Office is trully acting in good faith, then we should shortly see the interview released after having been looked over by a few people; and we should expect the bureaucrat who made this decision to be willing to answer his own set of questions.

could an Anonymous coward (3, Funny)

oliverthered (187439) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039783)

Well could an anonymous coward take the interview instead? since an anonymous coward is not a representitive of a company.

I'm sure a few answers scattered arround the place wouldn't get noiticed.

Re:could an Anonymous coward (1)

msgmonkey (599753) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039897)

Yes I can see it now, same questions originally to be answered by patent guy is now answered 5 minutes later by "anonymous cowarf"... 5 minutes after that patent guy is fired.

5 minutes after that patent guy is fired. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039995)

This is Europe, you'd get in hell almight shit if you done something like that.

Re:could an Anonymous coward (0, Offtopic)

$rtbl_this (584653) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039902)

Good idea. I'm sure the moderators will have no trouble telling the difference between this *ahem* anonymous coward and a sufficiently clever troll. :)

Re:could an Anonymous coward (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039996)

Usually you can tell when the bozon force field detector starts going off the scale.

Re:could an Anonymous coward (1, Offtopic)

DrVxD (184537) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040022)

> clever troll
Isn't that an oxymoron?

Re:could an Anonymous coward (0)

Fizyx (93551) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040027)

That should have been 'insightful', not 'funny'. IIRC, one of the reasons for having ACs in the first place was to allow insiders to say their piece.

Re:could an Anonymous coward (1, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4040042)

Well could an anonymous coward take the interview instead? since an anonymous coward is not a representitive of a company.

Hi all,

It's Anon Y. Mouscoward here. (My name is from the province of Niyusistad, BTW).

Here are my answers:

1. Yes
2. No
3. Yes
4. Yes
5. Every Tuesday
6. No
7. Yes
8. Dental Floss
9. No
10. Larger coils

Thank You.

skeletons anyone? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039784)

I guess John's employer has something to be ashamed of, and wants to keep it under wrap...

A free world? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039787)

This does not sound like a free world to me. Not at all. Too bad the goverments are too caught up in popularity contests and corruption to activly stand on the "little" mans side.

What were the questions? (2)

cpuffer_hammer (31542) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039801)

Well lets have a look at the questions.

Re:What were the questions? (1)

*xpenguin* (306001) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040007)

Use the "search" feature of slashdot.

More power to Alton! (1)

AtariDatacenter (31657) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039811)

I can't wait for the QA session. I want to ask him why he hasn't been on Iron Chef yet, and if he thinks he has a good chance against those guys?

PS: I am glad that Alton does not teach us how to cook hot-dogs with an electrical plug and two forks.

Re:More power to Alton! (1)

RocketJeff (46275) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039910)

I want to ask him why he hasn't been on Iron Chef yet

Simple, they (the Japanese) canceled Iron Chef quite a while ago. Can't be on it if they aren't making any more.

Also, they never did have very many non-Japanese chefs (which makes sense since it was a Japanese show).

Re:More power to Alton! (4, Interesting)

autechre (121980) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039930)


He probably hasn't been on Iron Chef because the show hasn't been filmed for years; it's just that it's slowly making its way over here. Most anime takes 2 years to get here, and the dubbing on Iron Chef is (generally) higher quality (not that I think need it at all, but...)

He has said in an interview that he doesn't consider himself a chef, and holds master chefs in high regard as artists, but is annoyed that they publish cookbooks, because "ordinary" people will never be able to duplicate their efforts. He likens it to Picasso publishing a "Paint like Picasso" book. Check out www.goodeatsfanpage.com for that interview, as well as transcripts to every show, and all sorts of good stuff.

What I'd really like to ask Alton is how much control he has over the recipes that appear on foodtv.com. His herb spread recipe from "Good Milk Gone Bad" seems to have been altered quite a bit, and in fact, the spices he used are listed as an alternative! Also, two of the recipes from "Deep Purple" (eggplant) seem to have suffered similar fates. In the episode, he made a big deal about combining all the other ingredients for baba ghannouj first, and then adding the parsley last, because, "You don't want to pulverise that parsely" (or it will turn bitter). But the foodtv recipe listing just tosses it all in at once. It also shortenes the draining time (for removing bitter alkaloids) from 30 minutes to 10 minutes. And though it's nice that they doubled the Eggplant Pasta recipe to serve more people, they seem to have quadrupled the olive oil, tomatoes, and basil; and again, the prep time is reduced (purging time given in the show was 15 minutes + 1-3 hours; here, it's 30 minutes). As picky as AB is about methods, I find this very strange.

Re:More power to Alton! (1)

Mikemenn (594361) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039999)

> What I'd really like to ask Alton is how much > control he has over the recipes that appear on > foodtv.com. Actually, I think the recipes come from him. I think he submits them long before he actually starts taping the episode. Then as they are taping and other people read the script, crew who try the recipes, his own chefs start work on it, they change things. So, the episode recipe can (and has been) different than what's on foodtv.com. That's why I began (but haven't always) created a recipe from the show. You can find links to those pages in the Episode Index section for each season. Mikemenn http://www.GoodEatsFanPage.com

Alternate story idea (4, Funny)

El_Smack (267329) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039818)


Instead of a "Peek Into European Patent Examining " story, how about a "Peek Into European Panty Examining" story? I would love to find out who "Inspector 12" is.

It's not as bad as it looks.. (5, Informative)

ltning (143862) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039833)

I'm also working at the EPO, as an external contractor. It is interesting to see that he has been forced to pull his interview, but there may be some good reasons for this. And probably none of them has anything to do with the questions per se.
Imagine you working for a huuuuge company, say IBM, Microsoft, WorldCom ;) or any other company getting lots of media coverage. Imagine you, as 'just another worker' would start answering questions from the press and so on. No matter how much you would state that you do not represent them or their opinion etc. etc., try thinking how easy it is for a newspaper, website, radio station, etc. to simply edit those statements away.. Not only would you risk ending up having your statements treated as if they were 'authoritative', you would, with good reason, piss your boss off.
One thing is to talk to your friends about the good and bad things happening at your job. An entirely different thing is to publically make statements about it when you really have NO authority to do so. If you are working for someone, you need to be able to trust your employer, AND your employer needs to be able to trust you.
I could have said a lot of interesting things about how the EPO works, both positive and negative, but I won't do so in a public forum simply because it is not my job!
If you want answers from the EPO, or any other company or organization, there are usually public relations departments or the like. They are not always too helpful, but that should always be the place to start. And I wouldn't be all too surprised if they would indeed agree to do an interview with the slashdot crowd. After all the EPO takes pride in saying it's an organization of scientists, fundamentally differently organized than the american patent office, and atleast some people in high places do identify with our kind.

Re:It's not as bad as it looks.. (1, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039871)

It is everybody "job" to inform the public. and usually the mentioned "public relations departments" dont _answer_ your questions but try to talk around the subject.

Re:It's not as bad as it looks.. (1, Insightful)

cHiphead (17854) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039879)

oh well that just explains EVERYTHING. anyone else honestly disturbed by the lack or rights we seem to have once we're employed?

Re:It's not as bad as it looks.. (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039963)

cHiphead, you are a fAggothead.

Re:It's not as bad as it looks.. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4040004)

Generally governments are considered to have a greater responsibility to communicate with the public than business. Theoretically, at least, the public are the employers of the government. In effect, when a government employee is prohibited from speaking to the public, he is prohibited from speaking to his ultimate boss by a middle manager.

Then can the questions be submitted to PR? (2)

mekkab (133181) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040009)

The next logical question then is why doesn't slashdot submit the questions using the proper channels?

This has the two-fold benefit of having "our" questions answered and making them look good. That way I can glide past all the "look at how secretive and curropt the EPO is!" posts...

Its a litigious(sp?) world we live in, and it would be horrible for a blatantly bad patent application (you know, the kind that get approved in the US everyday?) to take the EPO to court based upon some answer that a guy (who just so happens to be employed by the EPO, therefor acts as their agent) gave, forcing the patent to be granted, and set the precedent for bad patents!

just becuase we are geeks doesn't mean we can't follow some rules.

Re:It's not as bad as it looks.. (2)

King_TJ (85913) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040067)

See, I don't agree though.

I understand exactly what you're saying, but I feel it's the responsibility and job of the press to interview the appropriate people for the piece they're trying to put together.

If a member of the news media approached me and started asking me for some information about my job, I'd assume they had some sort of valid reason to choose me for the interview, as opposed to upper-level management.

I'd also expect (and even demand) that in the interest of good journalism, they'd properly state my position within the company I worked for. (EG. If they quote me, they don't have to necessarily use my name - but they should at least explain that "One of the employees was quoted as saying....", instead of making it look like I was a mouthpiece for the C.E.O.)

Nobody being interviewed really has the ability to know, in advance, how their interview will be used. All you get is a really rough outline of the type of piece being published or aired. Therefore, you always place a certain level of trust in the reporter or interviewer to use your comments properly/accurately.

If this trust breaks down, people quit volunteering to be interviewed.

protest emails (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039852)

can we please please get his employers email address to write protest emails? (specially interesting for citiziens of the European Union, since I guess his employer is funded by OUR taxes and should act in OUR interests!)

Re:protest emails (2, Insightful)

ltning (143862) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039865)

In fact, the EPO has nothing to do with the EU. It's a standalone organization. AFAIK it gets its funding from the member states and from the patent owners, not from the EU as such.

Re:protest emails (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039898)

ok, thanks for the information and sorry for the misinformation.

Alton Brown (1, Offtopic)

maxwells_deamon (221474) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039875)

Is this where we submit questions? Or is an editor going to setup a separate article?

It looks like most of this thread is rants on the cancled responce.

An alternate person to interview this week (3, Funny)

PD (9577) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039878)

I'm volunteering to do the interview this week in lieu of the European patent examiner who unfortunately could not do the interview.

Go ahead, ask me anything.

Re:An alternate person to interview this week (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039949)


Why does Europe still belive in Facist oppresion of speech?

Re:An alternate person to interview this week (0, Offtopic)

$rtbl_this (584653) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039970)

Spit or swallow?

Re:An alternate person to interview this week (1)

PD (9577) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040017)

Hypothetically speaking of course, spit.

Alton Brown (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4039892)

This guy is fairly useless, much like John McAfee, a tireless self-promoter. Read ego. This is NOT a Slashdot subject, unless you do one on Emeril! Dooshe bagguettes!

Big differences between EPO and USPO (3, Interesting)

pieterh (196118) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039896)

While the USPO will happily grant patents for software algorithms, the EPO does not do this, and clearly states so in its material, and when questioned. (I've asked the EPO myself.) No, the EPO does not allow such blatant exploitation by twisted business. No... you have to be much more sneaky, describing your algorithm as a 'machine' that just happens to be implemented as software.
As so often in Europe, we have the same dirt as everywhere else, but it's cloaked in bureaucratic verbage.
It would have been fun to rip into an EPO spokesman, but it would have to be someone with the authority so actually answer questions such as "How many US firms have already registered software patents while the EPO is refusing these from little European software firms?"
You can tell I've not much hope for the EPO. They may be scientists, but that does not stop them being fools.

Re:Big differences between EPO and USPO (1)

Hayzeus (596826) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039972)

No, the EPO does not allow such blatant exploitation by twisted business. No... you have to be much more sneaky, describing your algorithm as a 'machine' that just happens to be implemented as software.

I worked for a US patent law office (way back in the 80s) and this used to be the policy in the United States. I'd be interesting in knowing what precipitated the change. Unless memory fails me, it would have been inconceivable for the USPTO to grant a patent for pure software, let alone a business model.

Ironically, I'm actually listed as an inventor on a pure software patent (sh*t, I know -- company legal manuever). Does make a nice resume decoration, tho.

I was hoping for... (2)

davie (191) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039916)

I was hoping for an interview with a Nutritional Anthropologist, but I guess we'll have to settle for Alton.

Anal Manager... (-1, Troll)

RazorJ_2000 (164431) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039926)

Look!! Yet Another Knee-Jerk Reaction From An Anal Manager Who Probably Has A Degree In Business But Not A Degree In Common Sense.

L!!YaKJRfaAMwphaDiBBnaDiCS.

help NAI Labs slashdot their geocities mirror! (-1, Offtopic)

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And in further news... (1, Troll)

pieterh (196118) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039941)

The EPO invoked the DCMA to prevent employee J. Savage from exposing the inner workings of the EPO's patent approval process, saying "we consider the EPO's approval process to be a trade secret protected through our jargonising encryption machine (pat.pend), and any public discussion of this process would violate upcoming EuroDCMA legislation."
Independent sources from said that Sony was working on a new jargon-compliant DRM package - OpenPatentOffice/MG - that would control and monitor all use of patented inventions automatically.

This isn't New World Order, just Gov't SOP (2, Insightful)

SkipChaser (548969) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039962)

I'd be suprised if he had been allowed to answer questions. It's just plain old SOP that release of information from government agencies must go through the agencies' procedures. This means that the garbage man isn't able to tell me how he drives the truck and works the trash compactor without a policy statement from the mayor's office saying what to tell me. Is there still a bank secrets law that keeps bankers from saying how much cash reserve they have to maintain, etc? Maybe there's secrecy laws for patent offices? And their probably secret too.

I expected this, it's a standard employment clause (1, Flamebait)

tiltowait (306189) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039975)

"Don't talk to the press without permission" or "divert all media inquiries to the communications office" are boilerplate phrases from most every employee manual.

It's a control issue, for fear that every statement released will appear to be official company policy (cf. those "my opinions alone" email sigs, or /. headlines "Microsoft says..." that should be "A single Microsoft peon says...", or the recent Saudi pentagon leak, etc. etc.).

If you think this level of control isn't necessary for communications reps to do their job, why don't you give everyone root access and see what happens. :)

File this.... (1)

BMonger (68213) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039977)

Quick! Somebody file a patent through them that gives you credit for thinking up cancelling slashdot interviews! Then you can tell them that they have to pay you $10,000 to cancel the interview... that'll learn 'em. They'll probably approve the patent anyhow knowing what other patents have been filed in the past...

No more circular swinging, no more phone dialing music, no more wheel... durn...

Any recent retiree's? (3, Insightful)

Tablizer (95088) | more than 12 years ago | (#4039989)

Somebody who is recently retired would still have a fresh view, yet not be at risk of being fired (unless they can yank your pension if you make them look bad).

Question for Alton Brown: Brining poultry (2, Interesting)

EMIce (30092) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040021)

Mr. Alton Brown,

I'll be doing an annual turkey fry with a couple buddies before summer's end and the question of brining has come up. What exactly does the brining process do to the bird? What part does the sugar vs. the salt vs. H2O play? I've observed that brined chicken breasts develop a nice brown color and are juicy but would like a more scientific perspective, especially with respect to brining + frying. One concern is that the sugar on the skin may carbonize under the high cooking temperature.

I plan on brining the turkey for a day, followed by a day of sitting outside the brine, but injected with a buttery mix of herbs and spices. I'm also a little concerned that the effects of brining may be lost if the bird is left outside the brine so long before cooking. A scientific perspective would help me in better approximating the ideal way to go about this. Thanks! I really enjoy and look forward to your shows, the bee puppets in the honey episode were hillarious!

Analogy.. (1)

d_force (249909) | more than 12 years ago | (#4040052)

Kind of reminds me of the time a guy tried to apply for a patent pertaining to a "unique patent verification process". If approved, the patent organizations would be in violation of said patent, requiring them to pay royalties to the patent owner.

Personally, I think it was just this guy's unique way of pissing off the patent office when his original patent application was rejected.

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